So I completely forgot that my blog, this blog, turned one last March 8! Is that sad? It is, I guess. I don't know why I forgot about it. I have anticipated this day before, planning a special entry. But it slipped my mind when it was already fast approaching. I only remembered it this afternoon while doing the laundry. Household chores are always one of the best ways to contemplate on things. Haha.
I can't believe this blog is already in existence for a year. My first ever post was this:
Do not allow other people to stifle your drive to dream. Do not ignore them. Do not resort to tolerance and numbness. Do not feed on their accusations and belittling words. Do not shelter their intentions in your heart. Do not let go of your faith-- when it's all that's left of you.
A little too emo, huh? But I guess for the few people who really read this blog, my posts always lean on being emo, even though I don't mean that to happen. Sometimes I wish I had a decent sense of humor so I can crack jokes that will make you pee on your pants (that's a little disgusting, though). Sometimes I wish I had a celebrity-ish kind of life so I can post photos of myself and my friends frolicking around parties and events. Sometimes I wish I had a lot of money for travel so I can give you guys detailed accounts of the places I visit and the wonderful experiences and lessons I get from them. Sometimes I wish I was into fashion so I can posts photos of my latest finds from all these stores.
Oh, but what can I do? At the end of the day, I'm just an ordinary 20-something, living in a foreign country, working a 9 to 5 job, who just really, really, really wants to write.
There are times when I want to give up on blogging, and writing in general. I look at my posts and I feel as if nothing is actually happening, nothing is changing. I am way too far from achieving even half of what other young adults out there can do and write. So I immediately close the blog from public view. Then maybe after about half an hour, I bring it back again. I can never beat that part of me, I guess.
Then the weirdest thing happened last week. Omie and I were chatting on Facebook when she suddenly told me she read my post about her and her passion for teaching. She said one of her co-teachers told her about it. So naturally, I freaked out, thinking I'd never hear the end of it. But I was shocked when she said she liked it and that she's proud of me. Now that is the biggest, most incredible compliment I have ever received for this one-year relationship that I have with my blog. My mother telling me she's proud of me because of this. Haaay, the hardship and sleepless nights (well, not really, that's an exaggeration) thinking of the next entry were all paid off. I can only pray I don't disappoint Omie with my entries-- both past and future. Now that's something I have to work on.
Apart from that, reading my first ever post on this blog made me at ease. I knew it all along, right from the first few words that I typed and published. I had a purpose after all. I have that in me. And it doesn't matter how many faux pas I make in this blog, how many grammar errors need checking, or if my flow of ideas are in terrible disarray. None of those matter because I'm working on them and I'm continuously learning.
Being famous, having the best equipment to document what you ate for breakfast, being in that fabulous party they held at wherever, visiting Paris this summer, wearing the latest S/S collection from this expensive brand, all of these would be beyond lovely. But you do have something to say that not just any other person is capable of expressing, because it's yours, you have the best intentions, and it comes from your heart. That's what matters.
So what do you say? Let me repeat that:
Do not allow other people to stifle your drive to dream. Do not ignore them. Do not resort to tolerance and numbness. Do not feed on their accusations and belittling words. Do not shelter their intentions in your heart. Do not let go of your faith-- when it's all that's left of you.
Before I end this entry: As you may have noticed, I made changes with my blog (yet again). Also, I now have a Formspring.me account which you can easily access on the sidebar. Though I'm not sure I'll last because I still think it opens an avenue for unpleasant messages, which I am really scared of. Oh, and I don't know where that account will get me or if anyone will even be interested to ask things but I'm giving it a try. This blog just turned one, it's a healthy change. Hopefully.
Have a wonderful Friday!
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